SecRet pLace

2010-05-25T00:56:00.002+08:00

my first movie after exams.
The Backup Plan.
i guess, very much like her,
i need to learn to be more trusting.
was one of the reason why i was rather fearful then.
guess it doesnt even matters now..
just move on..
just move on....

2010-05-13T10:16:00.003+08:00

exams are really stretching me..
haven been sleeping well..
never fails to wake up in the middle of the night somehow...
my dark circles are horrifying..
BUT it's ending soon.. just abit more...

It's such a honor to worship..
knowing that this pleases You
and You'll reward...
i'm pleased with myself for this discipline too! :)
I love You too much to compromise with that....

Matt 6:33
But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.

2010-05-07T15:37:00.002+08:00

woke up in shock this morning....
to realise the fact that
he is still there....
was it a sweet dream or was it a nightmare to know?
i just wanna.......................

2010-03-13T02:34:00.002+08:00

Today was one of my most blessed day!
was suppose to lunch with jon, but went brunch with parents instead.
eating with dad and mum means my craving for chinatown's porridge combo could be satisfied.
had a really filling and awesome brunch with all my fav! (yums)
haha..
dad bought me a new watch!
been always yearning for one, but just din get it.
woo!! i've got a new watch!!!!
super happy! =)

cg was great, and i thought it was really a great fellowship with aaron.
God will surely grant the desires of our hearts when we delight ourselves in Him.
He spoke during cg.. and was amazing..

and last but not least, my supper craving was fulfilled!
was a sweet thought, but now i'm too full to sleep.
haha..

it's just a great day! start of something new. 2010! =)

2010-02-26T23:50:00.002+08:00

it's been a hectic week.
only found out my prelim dates on tue.
was my fault.. well.. am studying very hard though. haha

just back from cg. it was awesome..
i just love dwelling in God's love and presence..
being able to communicate with God is one of the greatest result of Jesus' sacrifice.
man, i just felt so loved.

i'm really so touched by all the little little things i have received.
a simple prayer, a simple artwork, a simple care and love...
it's enough.. big thank you!
and big big thank you, Daddy God! =]

2010-02-19T23:38:00.001+08:00

perhaps i shouldnt think too much...
just keep cool.. haha..

2010-02-18T01:08:00.002+08:00

just reached home 2 hours back...
gosh, i'm so tired!

the 6 days trip was enjoyable and joyful in general..
though we din really do much, but i really enjoyed myself..
just love spending time with family and relatives..
grandma's house was so filled with laughter and NOISE..
haha.. had my fill of bowls and bowls of laksa, so in all, was fruitful!
went to my uncle's plantation for chilli and lime..
was a rather exciting experience since it was my first visit to such places..

throughout all the fun, laughter and enjoyment..
God is good and His love never fails to accompany my everyday... =]

2010-02-09T09:36:00.002+08:00

it has been a good weekend..
managed to rest a little more..
liverpool won their match against everton.
a weekend of birthday celebrations.
little Lara's sweet.. (though she said she cant remember my name) haha
deeper in love with God
all these little things just adds flavors to my life..

He's Yahweh
And He shall reign forever
He shall reign forever
He shall reign forever
And ever

2010-02-04T01:21:00.002+08:00

right. finally finished what i'm suppose to send..
gosh. it was been a crazy week. been sleeping really late..
people always say picture paints a thousand words.
just look at my dark circles.... :(

attended BS at RW today. wow!! the session was really good!!
brother Darren brought his guitar and just got us to pray and connect with God during the starting of the BS, and man, the presence of God was just in the room throughout.
we ended by worshiping and prophesying over our own 2010.
it was just awesome!
believing God for more! =]

2010-02-01T11:39:00.002+08:00

it's feb already! man, time really flies..

last weekend was a great! received new revelations that charges me up..
something silly happened that night, but i'm believing God for miracles..
i know He would. =]

gosh. i really need to be more discipline..
people always say that reality is cruel. well..
one more month to prelims.
three more months to exams.

gotta stop worrying, start working on it. =]

2010-01-23T21:06:00.002+08:00

i totally smell like i've just soaked myself in a bathtub of medical oil.
gosh.. the warmth on my stomach just makes me wanna lie on bed..
feeling weak and moody... :(

2010-01-21T11:26:00.001+08:00

i felt that load off my shoulders after a solid QT.
God is faithful!

2010-01-20T00:35:00.002+08:00

He just never fails...
He's just so faithful.

Habakkuk 2:3
For the vision is yet for an appointed time;
But at the end it will speak, and it will not lie.
Though it tarries, wait for it;
Because it will surely come,
It will not tarry.

2010-01-18T01:37:00.005+08:00

haha. it's been a great day of celebrations!
people always say a picture paints a thousand words, so here goes.. :)

after such a hard time planning... hehe

mum's birthday.
well.. must really say, my brother needs more practise on photo taking. hahha.

really miss those times we spent together..

was telling hn, i'll say if miracles happen. haha. well..

2010-01-17T00:20:00.002+08:00

it was a great news!! Praise the Lord.
it's happening soon!! wooh!!

it's mum's birthday today!
but tmr will be the surprise though. haha.

i'm losing heart slowly. could be good though. haha

2010-01-14T00:53:00.002+08:00

right. i ought to be sleeping now, or just try to sleep..
but i just cant. so many thoughts and questions just come to me.
within minutes, thoughts just ran wild...
what has become of this place?? a hotel?
where are all the love and connections between one another?
maybe it's just me.....
i just need to let it out..
holding back....

2010-01-13T01:46:00.002+08:00

Super tired!!
Played badminton with my friends and now i really felt so "exercised". haha.
finally done updating the details for SmartKids.
am trying to be more discipline and organise. hopefully can keep going through 2010.
time to meet my bed!! *Yawns!

2010-01-12T14:36:00.002+08:00

time to....
unload some "luggage".
clear some spaces.
clean some areas.
spring cleaning is much needed.
haha..

2010-01-12T00:03:00.003+08:00

^{Proverbs 3:3-4}^(NIV)
3 Let love and faithfulness never leave you;
bind them around your neck,
write them on the tablet of your heart.
⁴ Then you will win favor and a good name
in the sight of God and man.

2010-01-07T16:18:00.002+08:00

this day, i experienced God's love in a special way...
what would i do without Him?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gTaSVXMtoZs

2010-01-06T17:59:00.002+08:00

gosh.. been battling since morning.
woke up from a nightmare which seems to be sending me a message.
God, show me the way and direct my paths.

2010-01-05T23:59:00.002+08:00

had a fruitful day!
managed to practise some of my poa questions.
gosh, i'm falling in love with poa, i pray. haha.

had a sudden random urge to bake cookies, but guess what.
no cookie flour! hahah.. well have to admit, i was alittle little disappointed,
but i can wait.. haha.

gonna have more discipline.
FOCUS FOCUS FOCUS.....

2010-01-03T22:50:00.002+08:00

it's 2010!! i know it's gonna be a great year ahead..
SMARTER goals! =]
"Be strong and courageous..."

Speaking to this mountain
To move into the ocean
With Your authority
Given to me
No matter what happens
Here I am standing
On the hope of Your Word
Promised to me

2009-12-30T01:17:00.000+08:00

it's 30th already... sorting out stuffs, emotions, mails, etc.
Spring cleaning soon!! haha
Soon! oops

2009-12-27T22:28:00.000+08:00

4 days countdown.
things on to-do list still unchecked....
come on! end the year well....
i can i can! =]keep going

2009-12-19T15:26:00.001+08:00

some things are just not meant to be...

2009-12-14T23:26:00.002+08:00

impulsiveness kills... to 2 pax.

"if only".........

i know you're just being concern.. *sigh

2009-12-04T23:38:00.002+08:00

Praise God, one down....
2 more assignments to go.. 2 more test to revise..
gosh..
time management and discipline..

thank God for answering prayers. miracles will happen.
God heals all the sick now.. Jehovah Rapha. =]

2009-12-02T23:15:00.002+08:00

3 assignments, 2 tests...
Gosh!!!
on the bright side though, i managed to finish that whole thick chapter for ISORG..
that pile of notes seems to have a certain "sleep-dust". haha..

conclusion of the day:
as much as i love to be home, i think it's too comfortable..
library's fruitful though. :)

I'll never know how much it cost
To see my sins upon that cross
the Heart of Worship

2009-12-01T12:41:00.002+08:00

it's the 1st day of the last month...
a time of reflection, a time of goal setting..
so many things still left uncheck on my to-do list..
come on come on..
Strength, grace and discipline needed from God....

Through You, I can do anything
I can all things
Cos it's You who gives me strength

2009-11-26T01:10:00.002+08:00

met up with jon after school at vivo..
carrying out the planning and preparations were fun and exciting..
though tired and sweaty, i believe all the efforts will pay off..
God, do it! =]
confess positively. i believe it's gonna be a great day on sunday!!
and tmr's cg will be exciting! =]cheers

2009-11-21T21:16:00.002+08:00

cant really remember how many birthday songs have i heard this birthday..
it's my best birthday so far!! thanks everyone!!
am so blessed and privilege to be part of the big family... =]

2009-11-08T20:14:00.002+08:00

reality hurts at times. recently has been a roller coaster ride on emotions.
i know i ought to stay calm and just let go and let God control..
why am i trying so hard to please everyone? to meet everyone's expectations on me..
it's gonna be never ending.....

i don mind to disappoint anyone and all. but i did.
what kinda person am i!
i hate this "me" that's so stubborn and being soft at the wrong times..
am on the verge of throwing in the towel, but i'm still holding on. i don wanna let go and regret.
just a little bit more.... just a little bit more.............

2009-11-08T00:07:00.002+08:00

what's going on?

ehh.. thinking back, i've not been serving so much for 2 weeks? well, this sudden tone down was definitely a restful one, and really set me thinking and suddenly, it's like i got a clearer view of everything. not thinking about it doesnt mean it's not there.. problems have been there all along. am i really tired already? hmm...

thank God that tuition has been cut and stopped, i really need that break.. studies has been so intense on me that i'm alittle lost at where or what to start studying. ha ha. tests and assignments are really a checkpoint or a wake up call that wakes me up to reality and to priortise my stuffs well..

i know it's not gonna be easy, but i'll hang on and I'LL END THE YEAR WELL... my Great Big Daddy God, move Your hands.. =]

2009-11-05T23:41:00.002+08:00

My soul cries out
For more of You my Lord
My portion and hope

I close my eyes
And feel You near
There's nobody else
That can take Your place in my heart

Cant live a day without Your presence
Closer to You I wanna be

God is good, and faithful. What will I ever be without You.
And You never fails....

Jeremiah 33:3
'Call to Me, and I will answer you, and show you great and mighty things, which you do not know.'

2009-11-01T23:55:00.001+08:00

just wanna dwell in Your presence
and fall deeper in love every single day..

The end will be greater than the beginning.

2 more months... must maximise all the time so that i can really be sure to say i have ended the year well! =]cheers...

2009-10-25T00:32:00.002+08:00

it has been great 2 days. only serve in tuition today. think i'm really getting a little weary already. thank God for a timely break. and it's really nice just to lunch with the tutors after months of busy-ing myself with busing.. haha.

it was a great meeting last night. being able to meet and build our own tents to seek the presence of God is just awesome. He never fails.. in the midst of seeking Him, just heard God telling me about rest (Mark 6:31).. it's really so encouraging.. and isnt it wonderful? =]

shared an offering message and was really encouraged. was reading my journal-notebook and there was this part that God sets me thinking about:

And because we llok for bonfire, we miss the candle.
Because we listen for the shout, we miss the whisper.

the whispered promise that speaks of another great mountain of glorious success over every defeat. sweet Jesus. what else can i say? i love You so much! thanks for loving me... =]

2009-10-18T22:20:00.002+08:00

am at the brink of breaking down...

Take all of me, Lord..

Mark 6:31
And He said to them, "Come aside by yourselves to a deserted place and rest a while." ......

2009-10-17T21:43:00.002+08:00

it was yet another dream i had.. i really wonder what is going on exactly.. i cant stop thinking.... it's irritating and frustrating! God, help me to get rid of the hopes and feelings i still have.. knowing it's not possible, i don wanna hold on.. argh! i just hate this feeling. guess it's not easy. but God, take over... thanks...

2009-10-09T00:21:00.002+08:00

well well.. i gues the only way to go back, is to turn back time.. all the emotions and feelings came back to me.. only to get me confuse and tied up..

what's the point of regreting now? everything's different. everything....

keep moving forth and don look back.. i know i can, i know God will help me through too..

nothing matters so long as You are with me.
through it all...........

2009-09-11T20:38:00.002+08:00

right.. it's been so so long since i last posted something.. guess the blog needs so revival. haha!

have been down since monday.. and today is my last day of MC.. 5 days of MC is really something "wow".. haha.. it's sat tmr. but not gonna serve. gonna miss my darling kids so much! :)

dreamt that i was serving with him last night.. was so random.. we haven been talking much ever since then and it's just weird... am i still holding back or what? haha.

back on track.. been staying home these 5 days. i tried making my days as fruitful. but somehow cant escape the drowsy-monster... haha. special thanks to weemeng, yingsheng, lawrence and jon.. the little gifts and all was sweet.. and i'm touched. haha..

tried studying in the morning since it's the only time i wun be drowsy. and was not so good. not discipline enough. haha..

this week didnt manage to carry out my J-project, do visitation, saturate, give tuition or even go school.. but was such a great week resting at home.. cool =] looking forward to sunday.. i miss my cg!!! cya guys! =]

2009-08-11T10:12:00.002+08:00

the presence and love of God is just amazingly sweet.. morning pm was great.. Pastor Tan lead us into an atmosphere of hunger and thirst for His presence, as we praise and worship Him.. God never fails.. He never fails to show up when He looks upon all those who hunger and thirst for Him..

it seem to be a challenge for me to wake up on time with only 3hours plus of sleep. but God heard my cry. not only did i wake up on time, but also stay awake and energetic.. praise God..

just sent out the email regarding overcoming our Pharaohs in lives. really pray hard they can be blessed. haha.. and Josh never fails to encourage me along the way.. i'm really really so blessed..

praise God =]and i love You Dad...

2009-08-09T00:19:00.003+08:00

i just wanna give God all the praise and all the worship..... went for service today and service was awesome!!!

He's simply awesome, amazing, beautiful, sweet.. and He gave us the attention today. as in He gave me the attention today!! *touched* and very very loved.... i mean who else could ever love me like He does. hold me with His nail-pierced hands tightly.

i'm.. i'm speechless... He's truly beyond words. and i just love Him so much.. and He never fails. He looks into the heart of each individual..

it's like my reward of being faithful and for being a servant, to stand in the gap despite not feeling too well. but thank God, i felt so much better than yesterday. Praise God.. =]

from the bottom of my heart, pray hard that grandma, jenelle, and all my kids, friends, family are well protected and can be healed in Jesus' name!!

2009-07-27T21:58:00.003+08:00

right.. 3rd day liao. missed cgm fellowship this week due to tuition. and missed service due to the headache attack. zz.. been unwell since sat's gastric. does gastric leads to other illness? haha!!

sat was great serving day man.. did busing with irene and we had a great time on the bus with the kids. (though we kinda made wasted rounds to the place) taught math in smartkids tuition. average attendance for the past few weeks were 30+. and this week i taught math, attendance dropped to 12. how encouraging was that man. haha. but thank God. 12 was easy to manage and easy to focus since i know their names....

went to expo to helpout 7-9.. i really love megan!!! 4yr old megan and her brother keian.. cute siblings.. enjoyed helping out there. though i really felt i din help much. but i like it there la.... hahas.

right.. gonna finish up the remarks of p1 for Lynn before i head to bed and R-E-S-T...... no more panadols! hahah!

a new vow made.. a sweet and heart-warming encounter once again. more and more! =]sweet

2009-07-22T05:24:00.002+08:00

right. i know it's 5plus in the morning but i just wanna post my thoughts and feelings now before i forget about it. haha!

i just reached home an hour plus ago. praise the Lord. it's really a breakthrough night. first, i met Joy for visitation at 5plus. and visited Kallang area and Bridge Road side. God, i'm gonna do my part and you help me break this ground k. more children to get save from this area!!!!!!

anyway, visitation was great. had a great time of fellowship with Joy as well. and she really taught me alot. and i know this is only the starting...... =] went for tuition at 8pm. and finally the highlight of the night. OPM!!!!

it's my first OPM, and praise God i can go. at first i was really worried when i know i had to ask mum for permission. in my heart and mind, i kept thinking and preparing for answers to counter her questioning. thought she would ask me, go where, do what and all.. but when i told her i'll be home late at around 1am, she ONLY say, you ownself already lack of sleep still want go out till so late... and that's all. she didn't question me or anything. praise God.......

that's not all. OPM was great.. the presence of God just fills the room. and His love just surrounds.. awesome. so, i called back to "bargain" and see if i can come home later, cos i really wanna stay for the entire meeting instead of leaving at 1am. and was approved. and at first, i told them i might go over my friend's place and wait for the first train instead, they were ok!

right, not just that...... i managed to come home at 3plus.. and when mum woke up just now. as in just, she asked. how come you are home. LOL. they don usually allow me to stay out one. but they did.... it's really like what the bible says in:

Psalm 37:4
Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart.

just love this amazing God i serve.. =]

to huiying: if you're reading this, i just wanna tell you that, i have been through that period of having strong PO. but God has brought me through and brought me out of it. parents are ok with me attending svc, cg, and even ministry now. and we all worship the same God. and if God can do it for me, He will also do it for you. hang on dear.. it's your breakthrough soon.. jiayou! =]

2009-07-20T23:29:00.000+08:00

it has been a great and blessed week..

had another 2 tuition assignment confirmed this week. and i'm really gonna quit starhub le. though in starhub, it's something i'm more easy and confident with doing. but tuition is less time demanding.. i think. haha!

anyway, was really blessed, even financially. thank God for the little little things You've done each day! =] sweet

fri's cell group was awesome. shared a word for the first time. thank God for the word and thank God for the boldness that led me out of my fear.. *glad!! hahas..

James 1:2-8
2My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations,
3knowing this: that the trying of your faith worketh patience.
4But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, lacking nothing.
5If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, who giveth to all men liberally and upbraideth not, and it shall be given him.
6But let him ask in faith, never wavering; for he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind.
7For let not that man think that he shall receive anything of the Lord.
8A doubleminded man is unstable in all his ways.

sat is the serving day. hahas. took s08 and return trip. thank God david came to help knowing i'm alone and since he's free. was super packed on sat! s08 then rush for tuition, then go do return. was quite chaotiv at first. but thank God, over over. haha!

after that went expo to help out children's church. isn't it great! seeing different children and their way of loving God purely and wholeheartedly. it just motivates and inspires me to love God even more!

sun's service was awesome. and His presence just fall and it's just awesome... it's been so long since i last cried uncontrollably in His love. for no reason, only His love.... God is love. and love never fails...............................

went to meet Joy after service. what she shared was really something i have thought an felt before... but she realy encourages me alot. and man, after she prayed for me and dessy, my tears continued flowing. gosh! it's embarassing but sweet...

i met this megan in 7-9 service on sat. man, she's so cute!!! and pretty! hahas. my tuition kid, the only gal, Letitia, is a sweet gal too. hahas. not bcos she said i was pretty. oops. (she thought i was married!!! do i look that old? :'( ) lol.... she gave me chocolate =]

exciting and amazing journey with Daddy God continues........... =]

2009-07-14T12:34:00.000+08:00

right.. haven been blogging.. so many things just brought me up and down recently..

first got hit-off by 2 saturdays back.. was in a lost state and i totally hate it when i din ask and check things out properly before i assume.. gosh! was in between a dilemma. i cant let either one off. i wun give up tuition for busing, and either will i give up busing on tuition. this is my promise. i cant bear to leave. and i purely just wanna serve God more. i really din expect this to happen though. (nth to consider).......

God.. rain down rain down.. i really need Your strength and wisdom to lead me through the many many decisions-to-make in life. and i really thank God for His grace which carries me through my everyday...

had received 2 tuition assignment so far. aim of leaving starhub should be another step nearer. and like what Joy prayed for me that day, God. i need your wisdom to have better time management and also, i need to know my priorities in the midst of serving God.. i really love Joy man..

tears just kept flowing down uncontrollably. i really hate the disorganise me.. many things were given to me but i just messed things up. and din manage to guard them well.. tell myself, not gonna let it happen again. and i know this takes discipline and God's grace.....

It's You i adore
Jesus my Lord
And all I want is to sit at Your feet
Nothing more

Your perfect love
Hung on a cross
You paid the price for my life
I long to know Jesus my Savior

i adore You
i adore You
i adore You
Jesus my Lord

2009-07-04T23:41:00.000+08:00

yesterday was the first cg i had with n451. gosh.. the presence of God just fell upon each and everyone of us, and it's simply awesome.. it's been weeks or months since i ever had this kinda encounter with God in cg. gosh! i just want more...

today was suppose to be a great day, i mean it was, overall.. woke up earlier than usual without lazing on the bed. miracle.. praise God i thought i started the day well and all. just that they were confusions in between and it really hurts.....

guess i shall not go into details. but to be honest, i m really really sad, i thought i could do more in serving the the Lord, and i seriously love serving in busing. the interaction with the kids, attending service with them, etc. though at times it's really draining but God is faithful. as i encourage the kids to draw closer to God, He never forgets me. NEVER.. He never fails to touch me through those kids..... it's really beautiful. [child-like faith]

God is faithful. and the most beautiful thing is that He gives His love unconditionally. Xiaoqian, remember those days when your love is pure and genuine towards loving Him. go back to then.... He's always there... 24/7 =]

2009-06-29T01:35:00.000+08:00

kinda am having mixed feelings now.. gosh, i really think i m so fortunate.. with the love of my Daddy God, blessing me with wonderful and complete family, great friends around, able bodied etc. and as i looked the less fortunate, how can i ever thank God for giving me all these things?!!

i m all down to tears and it really breaks my heart whenever God reminds me how fortunate i am to have what i already had... xiaoqian is rich!! because she knows she has enough and is gonna cherish all these things..... (he who knows he has enough is rich)

Break my heart for what breaks Yours
Everything I am for Your kingdom's cause

2009-06-25T02:30:00.000+08:00

what more can i say?? words alone can never express the love and desire.. the amount of love You have given, God.. thanks......

One thing that I desire in my life Lord
To thirst and hunger after You alone
With all my heart and soul
With all my strength and love
To worship as Your glory fills this place

Deeper in love with You
Deeper in love with You
I love You more than anything in life
Deeper in love with You
Deeper in love with You
Oh how I love You Lord

i love You God.....

2009-06-16T01:09:00.000+08:00

went to TP Revive meeting just now.. the sharing and meeting was great and the fellowship was awesome.. but kinda feel old already.. all of them are like year one year two.. yet we are graduates from TP. ahha!

saw the powerpoint which hn did for us.. man. after watching, all my emotions were in a mess. and have to say i really love them man..

been having ups and downs recently.. but really thank God for all that He has done to bring me through all those trials and never fail to bless me...

God, please protect my grandparents!!

2009-06-04T22:50:00.000+08:00

in the midst of revising and studying for the upcoming exams.. cant stop eating.. tsktsk. how!!!! argh!

gosh. econs and maths is terrifying man.. and i really need to have better discipline and better time management man. gosh...

2009-05-27T01:16:00.000+08:00

alright... my fb status is currently : xiaoqian wonders why... and i really do wonder why. why cant they understand. why cant they just admit they're at fault too. why must they push the blame away to me...

oh well.. perhaps it's just human. i mean.. eh.. i dunno... gosh. it's just so disheartening when such things happen again.... :(

but on the bright side. thank God. for alvin and qiaomei who keeps checking out of me.. like if i m ok spiritually, emotionally, on my studies-wise too!!! they're really nice people around too..

still struggling with econs! God, need You!!!

All i desire is You

2009-05-23T02:24:00.000+08:00

Praise God..

for that moment, hell seems to come over me.. worries and fears grabbed me and overcome me.. thoughts of giving up studying kept playing in my head. i really want to study! i really want to! just that sometimes what you want may not be what you get.. :(

but praise God, His love and peace comforted me. His wings of protection spread over me and brings me back to His goodness...

I believe in the power of Your name
I believe in the promise of faith
I believe in the love of a God
Jesus my Savior
I believe

Speaking to this mountain to move into the ocean
With Your authority given to me
No matter what happens
Here I am standing
On the hope of Your word
Promised to me

2009-05-19T12:37:00.000+08:00

hey there bloggie..... i know i promised and really aimed to be happy whole day. even prayed about it, but just need a place to trash out my negative thoughts before it gets me the whole day...

Ruth once shared with me before saying, no one is indispensable. i've been trying hard, making it a point to keep in contact with them, yet it seems like i m doing it myself. does anyone appreciate it? or they would even find it irritating? ...i dunno.

is it just so so hard to maintain the friendship or any relationship?? or it's simply my problem... :(

the one and only one who doesn't and will never fail me would be God. thank God for my parents, siblings, friends, relatives, etc etc. most importantly, thank God for Jesus. for giving Your one and only one. =]

*embracing new hopes each day, and facing the obstacles ahead with a smile =)

alright. i'm better.... ;)

2009-05-14T02:30:00.000+08:00

sigh... not so good man. study loan didn't get through again. gosh. things are getting hard. i'm really so fed up with the RHB bank people. cant they do things properly and be more resposible?!! is that too much to ask more? come on. service stardard's so horrible!

anyway, had another econs lesson today. thanks to those who have kindly offered me help.. i'll really need to ask already. cant really understand the front part. but thank God, truly "Ask and you shall receive".. i'm beginning to follow on the right track with the mono-tone lecturer and the lamey lecturer.. =]praise God...

phew. had a rather tough fight with brother. but thank God it's over and things are getting just fine now.... alright. manu match with wigan is starting. let's see how dirty and rough manu players are! (puke!) lol

FAITH IS DARING THE SOUL TO GO BEYOND WHAT THE EYES CANT SEE.... (sweet =) )

2009-05-08T02:27:00.000+08:00

right.. i'm really sad now. i seriously mean sad... i just cant get it right.. i'm confused. am i disappointed, frustrated or just plainly sad. gosh... i dunno.....

i can understand what she's trying to get to me. but it's just that, i need her to understand. it's not that i don wan to. but just don like it that way. sigh.. will i still enjoy going back... back to ponder about, should i change cg? (don wanna accept that as a option though, but isit possible??)

2009-05-07T00:47:00.000+08:00

postie..

kk. started SIM bridging course last week. and only had few days of rest before i'm back to the chionging part again. was super worried regarding the issue on study loan. isit finally solved? or not yet???? argh!

went out movies with david- 17 Again. was a nice movie=) and after walking around PS awhile, went to meet dg hn and the rest. gosh. it's just awesome hanging out tgt and just talked laughed and have fun... love it.

had a small disagreement with mum before i went out of the house today. saddened.. it's like ok, i know what to do, why does she always have to nag about it again and again. i'm worried and troubled too! why cant she understand how i feel?? BUT at the end the whole "broading over it", i came to this conclusion, no matter how unhappy or frustrated we are when things between 2 person goes wrong, always come back to the point and be reminded of how much you love the other and how much the other loves you.......... =]love you mum.

2009-05-03T11:08:00.000+08:00

.... i have to admit i'm blur.. totally out of situations.. zzz. guess what. i missed my first lesson for econs.. how dumb can one be.. zzz....... :(

have already had 2 lessons of math. and God, seriously need Your wisdom to see me through. needed to be more concentrated and disciplined to understand and digest whatever the teacher has taught....

2009-04-30T02:34:00.001+08:00

it's aresnal vs manu....

well, is it worth my dark circles? eh.. well, perhaps.. oops..

countdown 30hours to my first day of school in SIM. gosh! i'm all excited.. (don remind me of the stressful part though).. printed out my lecture notes. man, i really miss math!!!!

been watching the winter melon drama.. getting nicer. cool...

kk. maggie mee for supper again... God, i pray the fats would all burn off man. haha! ta-ta

2009-04-28T23:00:00.000+08:00

been resting at home for the past 2 days. packing and doing housechores.... slowly but surely am beginning to feel the intensity of the upcoming month...

will be working for the next 2 days and finally on friday, school is starting... will be schooling on saturdays and sundays, including public holidays! gosh.. not forgetting work! God, i need another job... starhub is really straining me.. tired. needed help too...

kinda had mixed feelings now... am excited for school but am alittle stressed up already....

Freely You gave it all for us
Surrended Your life upon that cross
Great is the love
Poured out for all
This is our God

2009-04-23T19:33:00.000+08:00

sigh.. not so good. not so sweet..

i'm just so so disappointed and sad. ever had times when you had to sacrifice your schedule to meet your friends, to just chill and hang out together? many.. but why do people only focus and look at the "pangseh" moments and be angry and pissed off even though you've apologised??

alright, i'm not saying i'm at NO fault. but i've said sorry. and those times which i had to change my plans and give in??? gosh.. everyone's having their down moments together it seems... i just cant play the role of cheering them up now...

sorry ivan.. and sorry jon if i didn't help much...

cheer up.....

Let everything that has breathe
Praise the Lord forever
Let everything in my soul
Praise the Lord

2009-04-21T01:25:00.000+08:00

great.. worsen my feet's wound after badminton game.. zzz.

anyway, have received my SIM confirmation at last. gosh, the documents are gonna be killing me.. so much to fill in and account for. diaoz....

which is better? PX-800, PX-720C or just get WK-8000.. gosh! hard.....

2009-04-19T01:35:00.000+08:00

phew.. was exciting and challenging doing busing alone today. whaha! had a great time though. and thank God i did prepare some stuffs for games in case. and thank God i bought lolipops for them yesterday.. whahaha!

just finished watching soccer match... it's chelsea vs arsenal... 2-1.... win! yea. ;)

2009-04-17T22:56:00.000+08:00

I'M HAVING MUSCLE ACHE ALL OVER. whahah! shows i'm exercised. yes!! i finally did. LOL....

went library today and made a trip to Courts.. i was right. they do have keyboards.. and yes, i want one!!! told dad and mum even before they stepped into the house. "i could pay for that myself though, dad just has to sign it.........." but NO comes the answer. gosh!! God, enlarge my room, enlarge the house so that my beloved dream can come to past!!!!

2009-04-17T01:32:00.000+08:00

tired tired.... had 4hours of badminton game with dg and kenny they all.. ok, not exactly 4 hours straight.. i've learnt a lesson today. i ought to eat something before i actually exercise. else i'll really faint...

had a great time sweating out =] and i'm really tired already! hahahah!!!!!! glad=]

2009-04-15T00:48:00.000+08:00

yea.. did visitation with Joy today.. was a great sense of satisfaction though the trip was alittle torturous under the humid weather. but gosh.. we went from upper boon keng road to kallang bahru to boon keng side to potong pasir. hahahas! did quite alot of exercising huh. hahhah!!

was great being able to visit again, esp with kids on my bus and kids whom i've visited before.. had a special case, which after doing that particular home visit, my heart just feels so heavy. thank God Joy prayed together with me..... but still, wanna say, God You protect and bless her. continue to pour down Your unfailling love upon her....

As I lift my hands
Pour Your mercy O God
Longing for Your presense now (x2)

I surrender all
And I will follow You
I surrender all
Bring my life to You
I surrender all
Love my life for You
I surrender all
I surrender all
To You, My God

2009-04-14T02:01:00.000+08:00

right.. conscious sets in, mind and heart starts regreting... why? why? why din i push and persevere for SOT....

anyway, had a penny for thoughts.. isit that hard to be able to strike that balance between friendship and relationship?? so many people faled to do so.. when it's me, will i be able to learn and grasp it properly then????

2009-04-12T01:21:00.000+08:00

easter easter easter.

had a busy busy Good Friday and sat.. i seriously did enjoyed myself though there were times of chaotic-ness in the midst... did busing for both days! was great!! decided to turn in early at 10 plus after the drama show so that i can survive today.

a big heart attack in the morning to say they forgot our choir-kids-bus! in the end thank God it wasn't as late as we thought would be... phew. hahas.. felt a sense of contentment when i was finally tasked.. and it was just great to be able to see the stuffs completed.. =]

busing was great.. had photo-taking with the children. and can see they are excited and eager to take pictures.. hahahs!

happy easter everyone... and i am really so touched by the FACT that Jesus was crucified just for our SINs.. cant help easing the heartache...

One thing I ask
That I may dwell in Your house Forever
One thing I ask
That I may dwell in Your house Forever

2009-04-10T22:09:00.001+08:00

gosh.. salute to myself. didn't know my body can still sustain me through till now. had only 30-45 mins of sleep!! gosh, it's so "unglam" to be zombified..... hahhaha!

it's Good Friday!!! fell sick yesterday and didn't serve. cant missed it today. did busing with Joy and Irene.. and Joy caught me unexpectedly by asking me for 2 games on the bus.. quickly went to do research for games.. hahahas!

managed to play "1 knot chase 2 knots".. kinda didn't manage to get everyone hype up and involved though.... but overall Joy thought was a good game. horrible thing was, i almost breakdown during the children's service.. but really thank God, He held me back. and the divine moment- worship, just calm my heart and emotions down.. as God begins to pour His love upon me.......

Let it be a sweet sweet sound in Your ears

2009-04-09T20:39:00.001+08:00

gosh, everything seems like a whole bunch of events happening together..

met up with shannon and soon wah for dinner at work on tue at PS. really hate having hubbing forms via ideal. took me a longer time to settle my closing figures. went for supper with kenny after work and i thought was a great work of sharing afterall it has been 3years snce we last seen each other.... only reached home at 4plus!!! and after bathing i couldn't get to sleep.. was on phone till 6 before i got to bed.... 6am!!!!!!!

woke up at 10 in order to meet hn dg and jo on time. i was early! though me and dg slept at 6plus! hhahah!! went to watch 12rounds. which was nice an too excited for me to actually "fall asleep".. hahhas. great discussion with hn and dg about ideal guys and girls......

missed 2 episode of table of glory... was totally lost as of what is showing... :( hahas. the ideal type of guys....... LOL

2009-04-06T22:21:00.000+08:00

Great... decided to start up a new blog add after seeing how "rubbish" my previous blog was.. Gosh.. his english standard is so good! kinda beyond what i thought it was though. Oops...

i kinda screwed it up when i failed to turn up for jon's 21st birthday celebration... right... he's disappointed with me. we've known each other for so long and as best pals, i mean, if i was the one, i will too.... sigh...

ok, positive.. i went to the library again today. was kinda rush, but still i've enjoyed the visit. gonna try my best to upgrade myself.. esp english!!!! hahah....

facing each day with a gentle smile and go on! =]

SecRet pLace

Psalm 37:4Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart.

Psalm 37:4
Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart.